Feelingless in Galle

Feelingless in Galle:


We spent our Saturday driving through the coastal road called Galle Road, for it lead to Galle. Everyone had told us about how scenic Galle was.

The drive was brilliant. It wasn’t just about driving along the coast. It was more to do with seeing Sri Lanka. We passed through numerous small towns- Moratuwa, lots of places ending with the word gama. We stopped at a place offering buffet sea food breakfasts. The world we realized is skewed towards non vegetarians and alcoholics. I and Vidya were happy that we had thulped breakfast before we started. We proceeded towards Hokkaduwa. We undertook a half hour boat ride where we viewed corals through the glass bottom of the boat.

I was amazed by the underwater life. I was more amazed by the way my life was shaping up. I was being sent to places which I wouldn’t visited on my own accord(for lack of funds). Right from Lucknow to Amritsar to Colombo.

Our next pit stop was a Dutch Fort in Galle. I would have normally stopped and read a bit about the history of the fort but the rains played spoil sport. We hurriedly posed for pics and scurried towards the van. We moved towards the beach at Unawattuna. We drove till the corner of the beach. It was now my turn to play spoil sport. I refused to wet my hair and just stood there waist deep in water while Anish and vidya ventured in. I also ran and took cover in the shacks whenever it began to rain. SPOILSPORT!!!

The jing bang consisted of I anish vidya, alwis from the office and his son rishwa. Of all of us I think Rishwa had the most fun. He was out there swimming, playing with his dad in the water, throwing stones and counting how many times it skimmed the water surface, eating ravenously off all our plates. He was soaking wet till his bones, he had a cold but he was loving it. I could also see that Anish was enjoying it. He just sat there having his beer in the rain, gorging on his chicken, smoking his cigarette.



At about three thirty we decided to head towards what was called the Lighthouse. As I entered the place I thought to myself “oh just another snobbish hotel” The Lighthouse belied all our expectations. I will post pics/ videos of the hotel rather than described for I would do no justice to the beauty of the place.

I sat on one of the numerous tables bordering the seaface. I watched the sea- the waves, how they broke against the rocks and washed ashore. I knew I was being engulfed by a calm which I couldn’t take on my own. I plugged my ipod and listen to some songs repetitively. What is it about the sea that soothes us?

To me it is the continue routine of the seeing the waves. I cant differentiate one from the other. But I take comfort in the thought that when one dies there will be another similar one. Friends who know me well know that I hate changes. Though I adapt well to changes, I am as bad as it can get at the face of change.
As I sat there I felt an emotion to which I struggle to put a name even now. So I took the reverse route. I listed in my mind some emotions I have experienced and tried to do a checkmark against each of them


Was I happy?

Well I wasn’t sad.

Was I melancholic?

Yes, definitely but that didn’t completely explain the way I felt. Melancholy was more an outcome of the way I was feeling.

Was I missing someone?

Hmmm…. Technically shouldn’t I be saying that I was missing family and friends. No I wasn’t missing anyone. Think that is what living alone does to you. I did wish appa saw this building. He would have loved the architecture. After all its not everyday you get to sit in a place from where you can descend a flight of stairs and reach the sea!!!

Strangely I also did not want to share this moment with anyone. Anish wanted to be there on a date with someone. I wouldn’t mind a date but am okie like this I thought to myself!

Back to what I felt.

Did I feel a bit betrayed?

Yes. I could trace a bit of betrayal- of lost friendships.

It was getting a bit tiresome. I really couldn’t find that one word that would explain state of mind and out me at ease. I sat there clutching my legs and watching the sea.
I have strange habit of praying to seas and mountains. I truly believe there is someone listening!

So I tried praying and pray I did.

No I didn’t realize why I felt like that. But I prayed for something that I wanted to feel about.

If I wrote about that too, then there wouldn’t be much left to imagination.